Helping our Children cope with Coronavirus
We are all having to adjust our lives to deal with and prevent the spread of COVID – 19.
It is natural for our children and young people to be particularly confused or anxious because they are witnessing normally confident and positive adults becoming troubled also.
So how do we help them ?
Feelings
1. Allow feelings even if they sound “silly” - Agree that the coronavirus thing is messing a lot of things up, and that it’s a bit scary and even angry making. Let teenagers and those with special school examinations or projects to get mad or sad about it.
2. Ask “how do you feel about what’s going on? “ and listen carefully, acknowledge, before rushing to reassure. Even if their ideas sound wrong or worrying say “tell me more..?” first, find out what’s in their heads and empathise “ Hmm that would be bad..” before correcting their ideas.
3. Let children “find their feelings” through talking, drawing etc Can they draw a picture of how they see things?
(Make it a family thing – a virus drawing competition! Then compare results and discuss)
Facts
1.Ask what do they know so far? (don’t overload with information, start where they are)
2.Remind them that most people, especially children, will get over it pretty well.
3.Reassure that, although the adults are still learning, there are lots of doctors and experts helping them know WHAT TO DO.
The main advice is :
1. Stay calm
2. Wash your hands every time you come in or out, and between lessons, meals and bathroom visits.
3. Look after other people by thinking, calling and sending messages – we can’t make visits to older people like grandparents and people we know have been sick, but we can cheer them up by keeping in touch.
4.Give “space” as a present to all other people you meet when you are out, don’t squash in on them, keep a distance like you would need to throw a ball.
Staying at home - things to do
Try to keep a daily routine going, so limit the pyjama wearing. Have breakfast, lunch and dinner at the normal times.
Make a list of activities you can do – post it on the fridge.
Get old toys out and remind yourself of what you used to do. E.g. Lego, cars, dolls, books, Pokemon cards, plasticine.
Get your favourite thing (any item that you love, or that someone special gave you) and keep it by your bed.
Adults – DON’T keep the TV or laptop news on permanently in the background.
If you can, get out into the air to walk about, but remember – Give Space.
Keep active by having a massive “Dance around” in your house every day.
Find ways to keep connected to grandparents and older family members. Use online video chat or write old fashioned letters – and go post them!
Take a look at “The Invisible String” by Patrice Karst - it’s a picture book,(and audiobook) with a great image of how we are all linked to each other, no matter what.
so….Get a big piece of paper, and draw a map with YOU in the middle, and write or draw all the people you are connected to by Invisible String…
Look after your pets – keep them safe and happy. You can go out on walks, brush them, help to feed them etc
Dealing with anxieties
It’s important that children’s ideas don’t keep “running down the rabbit hole” of worry, by imagining bad things that could happen over and over again. If your child has a tendency to worry, you might find this happening.
So -
Focus on the HERE and NOW - What are you doing TODAY – focus on what you can do today, what will you do in the next few minutes, or even the next hour.
Help your anxious child to “rate” their worries from 1- 10…just how bad are they? This helps if they are ‘catastrophising’ ( its’ all a disaster) and get some perspective.
Talk about the worries one by one, and think about what could work to help things e.g. like the FACTS above - e.g. children manage this illness very well.
Use distraction - making, playing, creating, exercising, watching movies, baking, planting in the garden or in a window box.
Remind them about things that stay the same - your bedroom, the pets, Dad making dinner, the trees in the park, Springtime, being part of a school community - even if it’s closed for now.
Take the long view - we will work hard now to stay safe, so that there WILL be an end to all this.